One Week of Walking

I'm so proud of my baby and he is SO proud of himself for walking! The following video shows 2 things - one week of video clips of him learning to walk and his absolute addiction to binkies. Without further ado, here is Ian, 3 days shy of his 1st birthday.

Appointment with RE

I'm back from our appointment with the RE. She was much more pleasant this time around and actually seemed to have a personality. :-) Here are the facts. She highly recommends trying the 3 frozen embryos before doing a fresh IVF round. They are embryos made from 2 years ago and so have a better chance of having good genetics. Given my age, blood work results and prior IVF success, she isn't worried that we are wasting precious time doing FETs. She has no doubt that I will respond well to the next IVF (if we have to do one) and even said that the only reason we had only 4 eggs last time is because she purposely had me on extremely conservative doses of the stimulating hormones. I'm okay with this plan. I like the idea of using up the frozen embies so that we don't have to make the decision of whether or not to keep paying the storage fees!

There is a 50-50 chance of each of the embryos being viable after the thaw. Each of the embryos is frozen in its own straw and the lab will thaw them sequentially. So they will thaw one, wait to see if its viable (i.e., more than half the cells are still alive) and if it's not, move on to the next one. That way, they won't waste any if more than one is viable. Apparently, if an embryo survives the thaw, it has the same chance of becoming a baby as an embryo from a fresh cycle. And transferring more than one does not increase the chances of a round working. So the plan is to thaw one-by-one and transfer back the first one that is viable (if any are viable). I want to stick to my guns and not transfer more than one each time because I really don't want to risk having multiples. I'll have to remind myself of this if we start having multiple failures.

Each FET will take up 2 months of time. So if all 3 embryos are viable (unlikely) and each FET with one of the embryos fails, we're looking at "wasting" 6 months of time before moving on to IVF. I'm okay with this timeline. I want to have another baby 2-3 years younger than my son. If the first FET works, we're looking at the 2 year timeline. If we move on to IVF, we're looking at closer to the 2.5 to 3 year timeline.

So the next step is that I have to get a uterine ultrasound tomorrow (on day 5 of my cycle). This is a requirement for insurance approval (as is the CD3 blood work). They need to make sure that my uterus is still good post-pregnancy and there isn't anything wrong. Then I have to stop breastfeeding and wait 4 weeks for my prolactin levels to fall. They won't do a cycle on someone who is breastfeeding because (a) the hormones/steroids aren't good for the baby and (b) high levels of prolactin can interfere with implantation. I plan on stopping when Ian turns one, which is in only 5 more days! Then after my next period, I can test my prolactin levels and hopefully they'll be low enough so that after the next period, we can start the FET cycle. So this puts us on target to do a FET in mid-May, early June. Wow!!

I think it is very fortuitous that I got my period back this past Monday. It was perfect timing. I was able to get my CD3 bloodwork done the day before my appointment with the RE (which appointment I made months and months ago) and I'm even able to get the uterine ultrasound done tomorrow! I am full of hope right now!

**** Update - My uterus looked just fine.

Results of CD3 Bloodwork

This is what I wrote on March 8, 2008, just over 2 years ago:

"I took my day 3 blood panel, which revealed that my FSH level was 6.4 and my LH level was 6.0. This was very good news indeed, as a fertile woman should have an FSH level below 10 and the ratio of FSH to LH should be as close to 1:1 as possible (to rule out hormone disorders like PCOS)."

Here are the results of my blood tests from yesterday, March 10, 2010:

My FSH level was 7.5 and my LH level was 3.5. I guess it's great that my FSH level is still pretty low. According to this website, my FSH level is still in the "good" category of 6 to 9. And although my FSH to LH ratio is no longer 1:1, it's an LH that is higher than FSH that is one indication of PCOS. So that's not me (despite my polycystic ovaries).

It looks like my thyroid is okay since my TSH level was 1.84 with a normal range of .28 to 3.89. My estradiol level was 25.93. I'm pretty sure that low number means I'm not close to ovulating, which makes sense given that I was tested 3 days after getting my period. The website says that estradiol levels on the lower end tend to be better for stimulating. So woo-hoo! I guess if I have to do another round of IVF (which I hope not to do), I'm still in good shape (which makes me feel good considering I'll be 36 in 2 more months).

CD3 Bloodwork

Since I got my period yesterday (for the first time in almost 21 months!), I decided I might as well call my RE to see if I should get my CD3 bloodwork done for our attempts to have Baby #2. I was surprised to find out that the doctor said that I SHOULD do it. They won't test my prolactin levels because I'm still nursing Ian, but they said they could go ahead and check everything else (and apparently it doesn't matter that it's my first period in a really long time). So that's tomorrow! I know that a FET (or IVF cycle depending on what we decide with the doctor on Thursday) is a couple of months away at the very least, but it feels good to take steps towards that goal. So tomorrow I'll head over to the lab and get my blood drawn. And then on Thursday, we have the appointment with the RE to come up with a roadmap to Baby #2.

Part of me is SO excited to be starting this again. Part of me is absolutely dreading the mind games that I inflict upon myself. I have such mixed feelings because in order to take the next steps, Ian has to stop breastfeeding. They won't give me any drugs or do any kind of cycling while I'm still breastfeeding. So I need to make the conscious decision to stop that and wean my son. I also kind of want to have my body back for a little while - some time when I'm not injecting myself with hormones, not getting wanded up the wazoo, not pregnant, not recovering from a C-section and not breastfeeding. I just want to be me, if just for a month or so. So I may work that into the plan.

8 days left!

There are only 8 days left before my little baby is 1 year old!  I can't believe it.  It's very exciting!  Lots of good things happened today!  

Good thing #1:  While at work today, I got my period!  I *knew* that all of that goo 2 weeks ago was cervical mucous and that I was ovulating!  This is now proof.  I was getting so worried that I wouldn't get my period back, but here I am, almost 1 year after birth, and I'm happy to be using a tampon!  This means that I can plan our FET without asking the doctor for drugs to get my period back.  

Good thing #2:  Ian is taking steps on his own!!!  My husband e-mailed me while I was on the train home tonight and said "i just saw him take steps voluntarily!!!"  And sure enough, when I came home, Ian showed off for me.  I'm sure he'll be running around soon enough!  



Good thing #3:  Ian is no longer drinking breast  milk from a bottle.  We are now only giving it to him in sippy cups.  He wasn't drinking a ton from the bottle and so I figured it wouldn't hurt to make the switch now rather than prolonging it.  And daycare said he did great today! Sorry for all of the exclamation points, but it was an exciting day!

Early Morning Demons

Some demon is whispering in my child's ear and telling him to get up anywhere between 4:20 am and 4:45 am.  Over the past months, when this has happened, we have tried to let him cry it out and settle himself back to sleep, but it hasn't worked.  So I've gotten into a routine where I nurse him at this time and then he will fall back asleep until around 6:15 am.  Except lately, he's not gone back to sleep!  Yesterday, he fed at 5:00 am and was awake for good.  I made my husband get up with him.  This morning, I fed him at 4:45 am and put him back in his crib where I hoped he would fall back asleep.  Except he didn't, but instead of screaming (a good thing!) he's been talking softly and quietly cooing off and on for over 1 hour now.  I'm hoping there may also be some sleep time in there too.  Either way, I got up at 5:30 am and started working since I have an agreement to finish drafting by the end of the weekend.  My son may be able to sleep in between his coos, but I certainly can't and I guess I decided it was better to be productive than to toss and turn in bed.  I do hope that my son will eventually grow out of this phase and learn to sleep a little bit later.

Fun at Feeding Time

Ian, at 11.5 months old, no longer wants to eat with his bib on.  He snatches it off every single time I put it on him.  It makes feeding him quite a mess.  As you can see from the video, he has also learned to stick out his tongue!

The other day, Ian reached out his hands for me and said "mama" but I'm still not ready to believe it's his first word.  He tends to make the "mamamama" when he's upset and he was upset when he was reaching for me.

Ian has been sick lately.  He had a stomach bug that was circulating at daycare and after 4 days, finally got over that just to have a fever for the last 2 days.  And I've been suffering from some sort of stomach ailment too - nothing too major - but I've had a stomach ache for the last 5 days.  It feels like I've eaten a 5 course meal of beans every day, which is quite unpleasant.  I'm hoping that I'll feel better soon since work is really picking up.